50 Simple, Positive Things You Need To Do For Yourself After A Breakup

1. Get a haircut. A wow-you-look-amazing haircut to chop off the dead ends and start completely fresh.

2. Do one (or more!) random things you’ve always wanted. Like checking out that new Thai restaurant with a few friends, or joining that cooking class.

3. Spend time with someone older than you. A coffee date, lunch, or just sit and talk. Older people have incredible insight and will always make you feel like you’re loved and on the right track.

4. Cook those damn Pinterest recipes. You pinned them, thought ‘yes, I’ll totally make this!’ and then completely forgot. Now’s the time. And if you don’t like eating alone, phone a friend.

5. Color. Invest in one of those adult coloring books and just sit and relax. It does wonders for your mind and significantly lowers your stress levels.

6. Say goodbye to the opposite sex for a while. Breakups suck. And you need time and healing, so instead of throwing yourself into the dating world trying to get over your ex, say goodbye for a while and spend time with friends.

7. Set aside time to go to the gym and be religious about it. Nothing feels better than busting your butt and seeing results in the mirror, especially post-breakup.

8. Do something artsy. Take a drawing class, go to one of those drink-wine-and-paint events, or simply spend thirty minutes or so doodling. Art unleashes the creative side of your mind and can help you eliminate toxic energy.

9. Treat yourself to some new clothes. Go through your closet and purge of the tops you haven’t worn in years. Then snag some new dresses, cardigans—whatever looks good, and you’ll feel like a whole new you!

10. Spend quality time with the rents. (Without dominating the conversation with breakup talk.) Chat with your dad about his childhood, or with your mom about her favorite memories. Get to know your parents in a different way, and show them that they really do matter to you.

11. Make a to-do list and get sh*t done. This can be anything from little household projects to something major, like applying for grad school. (And crossing off items will make you feel on top of the world!)

12. Spend some time with yourself. This is often overlooked, but spending time alone is the best self-reflective, healing time. Paint your nails, journal, go on a walk, etc.

13. Create a bucket list. Be honest (and get excited) about what you want to accomplish before you die. Then start small, and plan and do (at least) one item.

14. Make a savings jar. And put it in a place where you’ll see it every day. Add a few cents whenever you walk by and start planning for something fun. Then set up a sacred savings account, add $100, and promise yourself to only add money, never take out.

15. Go on an impromptu trip to visit an out-of-town friend. We so often make excuses as to why we can’t see our cross-the-country friends and before we know it, we’ve drifted. Plan a trip to rekindle the friendship, catch up on everything, and see their world for a little while.

16. Journal. This is such a powerful tool for self-healing. Journal about your breakup, journal about your future plans, journal about anything. It helps to just get it all out.

17. Eat somewhere out of town. The same-old-same-old is boring. Find a place out of town and try it, just for fun.

18. Go on a daily walk. Even if it’s a short one (solo, with friends, or with a pup) this is a great way to break up the monotony of your day. Plus it keeps you active, refreshed, and energized.

19. Call up an acquaintance and hang out. Friends are awesome post-breakup, but so are new people and new experiences. So instead of always relying on the same few close girls, try starting a new friendship with someone you’ve always wanted to get to know.

20. Get out of the house. Whether it’s to tag along on a grocery shopping date or get some drinks at the bar, you need to get out of your house and out of your pool of sadness. Though it might feel like you’re putting on a happy face at first, eventually you’ll be busy with plans and a lot less lonely.

21. Have a self-spa day. From a bubble bath with candles and music to a full manicure and pedicure, the best way to feel good about yourself is to get pampered.

22. Take nature pictures. Go to somewhere really foresty, hilly, mountainy (or with an awesome view) and bring your camera. (No, it doesn’t matter if it’s a crappy camera.) Snap some photos, try to see things from different perspectives, and take in the beautiful view.

23. Pick up a new hobby. Something you’ve always wanted to try, like arm-knitting or fishtail braiding.

24. Get a part-time job. And spend your extra time making and saving money.

25. Make a ‘goals’ list. It can be a small as the next few months to as big as the next few years. Then start saving/planning and remind yourself of these plans when you’re feeling completely lost.

26. Rekindle an opposite-sex friendship. Dating can put a strain on outside boy-girl relationships. Reach out to someone you lost contact with, grab lunch, and catch up.

27. Turn off your phone for a day. Then spend a full 24 hours doing something you enjoy.

28. Spend time with a small child. Nothing refocuses your mind like spending the day with someone who doesn’t even understand the concept of love or heartbreak. Children will make you laugh and see the world from a completely different perspective.

29. Go to the library. When was the last time you went to a library that wasn’t for studying or class? Find a quiet corner and a good book and lose your sense of time for awhile.

30. Spend time with your siblings, no matter the obstacles. Even if you live a plane ride away from a sibling, see if you can visit him/her for a weekend, or have them stay at your place. This will be a change of pace and bring you closer.

31. Invest in some motivational posters/quotes and hang them on the walls. Then read them when you’re feeling stuck.

32. Rearrange your furniture. Sometimes a change of scenery makes all the difference.

33. Host a friend gathering. Don’t always expect your friends to reach out to just because you’re going through a breakup. Be proactive in doing fun things and have your friends over. (Plus you’ll be too busy planning to even think about your ex.)

34. Organize and go on a road trip or mini-vacation. This can be solo or with friends, anywhere from a state park to a weekend in Vegas. Just do something different.

35. Write a list of things you love about yourself. And hang it on your bedroom mirror. Then read it when you get ready in the morning.

36. Start weightlifting. No, nothing crazy, (unless you want to) but talk to your local gym or training guru and start adding some light lifts to your workouts.

37. Decorate your home. Invest in some cute throw pillows, picture frames, or make your own crafts. Then decorate your place with things that make it feel homey rather than lonely.

38. Write an old-fashioned letter to a friend or family member. Then send it snail-mail to them.

39. Volunteer. At a local kitchen, food pantry, after-school program, etc. And refocus your energy and attention on someone else.

40. Clean your room. And donate anything you don’t use/need/want to charity.

41. Start going to church on Sundays. And really listen.

42. Make a list of Netflix shows to watch. And limit yourself to 1-2 episodes per day.

43. Call up a friend and offer to help cook dinner together. Then lend a listening ear to what’s been going on in his/her life.

44. Do something completely scary. Like rock-climbing or skydiving, or the latest horror movie (with friends of course).

45. Sleep. Because sleep helps to regulate hormones and emotions and make you feel less depressed and/or crazy.

46. Force yourself to dress up at least ½ of the week. That means not getting home and quickly shrugging on sweats, but staying in your slacks and heading to the grocery store. It means 3 out of the 5 weekdays in respectable outfits (if you aren’t already for work). It means comfy clothes only on Sundays, thus forcing yourself to look good and feel good.

47. Find/make a thoughtful gift for someone you care about. And surprise them with it, just because.

48. Buy healthy foods at the grocery store. Then commit to meal-prepping and enjoying these good-for-you meals.

49. Write a letter to the ex. (But don’t give it to him.) Be open and honest with yourself, your sadness, and your anger. Forgive him and forgive yourself. Then let go. (And go workout).

50. Make three music playlists: sad-music, independent-music, and motivational-music. Then use them to have a good cry, to feel confident, and to pump yourself up.