35 Men On Whether They Enjoy When A Woman Makes The First Move

"Yes. It’s how I found my current wife."

By Lorenzo Jensen III

Updated 2 years ago, September 16, 2022

Found on AskReddit.

1. Love it.

Love it; I hate playing games and guessing.

2. Good god, yes!

Good god, yes! Started dating this girl once because we were in the back seat of a car and she kept bumping her knee into mine and grinning like a maniac at me until I put my hand on her knee. Then she grabbed my hand and slid it to her crotch.

Jesus, those were some insane months of unbelievable sex.

3. Love it. This isn’t the 1940s. You can speak your mind.

Love it. This isn’t the 1940s. You can speak your mind. Please do. Personally I like seeing women throw off these vestiges of the past.

4. It’s how I found my current girlfriend.

Have dated two girls who approached me first, including the girl I’m with now. Nothing wrong with it at all. I do, however, dislike it when I get approached when I’m with my GF (or when she’s around), though—then I have to tread a line between being rude and too friendly.

Just because a girl shows interest doesn’t mean she wants only you. It doesn’t eliminate the chase at all. I still had to woo both girls.

5. It’s how I found my current fiancée.

My SO was very bold with me. It was shocking at first but that was three years ago and now we’re getting married! Makes me smile every time I think about it. She knew what she wanted and went for our :-)

6. It’s how I found my current wife.

My wife gave me her number the day before I was planning on asking her out. Been together 9 years.

7. Depends whether she’s attractive.

It’s cool if I find her attractive, too. If I don’t then I’m flattered but also a bit uncomfortable. I guess it’s pretty much the same story for chicks.

8. Again, it depends on whether she’s attractive.

I’ll be honest.

Only if I’m attracted to you. If you do it and I’m already attracted to you, I’ll automatically be like 30x more attracted to you.

If I’m not attracted to you in the slightest and someone does it, it would weird me out.

The good gets better and the bad gets worse.

9. Like the two guys before me said—depends on whether she’s attractive.

Definitely!! But errr, with one small caveat. I like it when women I’m attracted to are bold and forward. The 40-year-old, obnoxious, overweight coworker who kept grabbing my ass and making it a point that I saw her gigantic cleavage is not someone I liked whether she was bold, brazen, or whatever other synonym.

10. She walked up to me and said, “I like you.” I was hooked.

Actually had a young woman walk up to me once and just flat-out say, “I like you.” Had me hooked.

11. Like most guys, yes.

The majority of guys want this.

12. Most of the time, yes.

It’s attractive like 85% of the time. Overdone 10% and awkward 5%.

13. Yes, it’s more honest.

Boldness often translates into clarity. Typically with bold females there are far fewer convoluted dialogues spent trying to figure out what is wrong before actually dealing with things. WHICH IS IDEAL.

14. I FUCKING LOVE IT!!

I FUCKING LOVE IT WHEN WOMEN ARE DIRECT!!

15. If she isn’t too forward.

Every guy will probably say he’ll love it, but being too forward can also be a turnoff and make guys think you are a ball-buster.

Like many things in life, balance is key ;-)

16. Just tell me if you want my balls or not.

I like it. I hate guessing at shit and figuring out what is/isn’t subtly or that “I said this but mean this” bullshit. Just tell me if you want my balls or not. It ain’t that difficult.

17. It’s attractive…and intimidating.

Yes it’s attractive.

Yes it’s intimidating.

18. As long as she’s classy about it.

I love it…up to a point.

I’ve had a woman look at me and tell me point-blank that she loved my hair and thought I was truly handsome. That was damn flattering.

I had one married woman grab me by the hair, yank my head, and say, “If I had that head between my legs, I’d just never stop pulling that hair” with her husband about 20 feet away.

I was not a fan of that one.

19. Sure, but don’t come on too strong.

Yes. Before my GF came along, I had such little confidence with females that I needed something or I gave up really quickly.

Having said that, I do enjoy a little bit of the guessing and flirting at first. If you come out too strongly too quickly and take away all the intrigue, then that’s no fun.

20. As long as she isn’t too loud and annoying about it.

I feel like sometimes it can be too much. Girls who tend to say exactly what they want/what they’re feeling can often get real loud and annoying. I know a lot of guys who get turned on when a girl is just really slutty and openly blurts about all the sexual stuff she’s into. It’s kind of off-putting to me. Aside from that, I find it nice when there’s some mystery behind her and it makes you feel way more attached and closer to her once you’ve gotten behind her mask, and when you gain a better understanding of her feelings.

21. It’s nice because I’m stupid.

Yes. It’s nice because I’m stupid, so subtle hints don’t work.

22. Depends.

Depends.

Recently had a girl that was very, very forward with me, and it was just awkward, because I wasn’t into it. Ultimately I appreciated the fact that she was just straight up and honest, but I still noped the fuck out.

23. If you want me inside of you, do please tell.

Yes. If you like me, if you want me inside of you, do please tell, because I want me inside of you as well.

24. Some can pull it off while others shouldn’t.

Some can pull it off while others shouldn’t. It’s dependent on other personality traits. It’s more likely to be attractive if they are an intelligent and positive person as opposed to a bitter and stupid person.

25. Yes—with seven exclamation points.

YEEEEES!!!!!!!

Seriously, as a virgin with serious self-esteem issues, this would be awesome!!!

Although it would probably not happen to me.

26. It’s like comedy. It’s all in the timing.

That’s sort of like asking women if they think a man who approaches them on the street and makes a move is bold or creepy, isn’t it?

It can depend on the mood you are in, the situation, how attractive the person is, and the approach.

If you are, say, actively looking for a partner so are in a willing frame of mind, she meets your standards of attractiveness, you are in an informal situation—like a dance club—where openness is okay, and she has a smooth approach it may be great.

If you are at your mother’s funeral, she’s got one eyebrow and two eyes staring in different directions, you’re trying to give the eulogy and she drunkenly staggers up and grabs your butt while screaming into the mike “Oh, I’d like to ride this all the way home!” then, yeah, it’s probably a bit intimidating and uncomfortable.

I don’t think there is really a hard and fast rule you can point to and say “this is how assertive each person needs to be at all time.” You have to vary it by situation and we all have different tolerances for what we are willing to put up with in various settings. Even who is watching might be a factor. If your friends are more likely to praise you for having a woman walk up to you then it is probably more welcome than the friends who catcall and tease. If you expectation is humiliation as a result, regardless of the person who is doing the approach, it’s probably not that welcome.

It’s like comedy. It’s all in the timing.

27. Don’t be rude or nasty, because that will make you seem like you just want to boink.

It’s not necessarily attractive, but it definitely makes things so much easier and more comfortable. Don’t be rude or nasty, because that will make you seem like you just want to boink and you don’t really care who you do it with. But be honest, open, and clear. If you are into me, go ahead and make it known.

28. Yes and no.

Yes and no.

You’re going to get a ton of “I hate games” comments in this thread, but there’s a fine line between being forward / bold and being abrasive / demanding.

I like the former. I do not like the latter. You can be forward and still be polite about it.

29. Intimidation breeds attraction for me.

Intimidation breeds attraction for me. Kind of like this primal thing going on like, “Can you handle this?”

30. Absolutely yes.

Absolutely yes. Games, riddles, and yes-mean-no-and-no-means-yes are for teenagers.

31. I love it!

Absolutely! I love it! Honestly, when I was younger I thought I wanted a princess in need of rescue, a broken girl I could fix or that needed me. Now I realize strong and secure women are far sexier and far more interesting. I want someone that will fight by my side when the times are rough, not stand in the shade of my protection.

32. There is a huge difference in being honest and being a fucking asshole.

I prefer anyone to be upfront and speak their mind, within reason.

Do: Walk by my cubicle and ask me if I would like to have lunch with you, most likely; yes.

Don’t: Pound on my desk and tell me that I am having lunch with you and that I’m paying for it because you like me and reasons.

Do: Tell me that you have had a crush on me and that you would like to go out on a date sometime, regardless if you think I feel the same way or not. We’re all adults here and no shame in taking a shot and missing, lord knows I’ve done that more than a few times.

Don’t: Tell me that I’m taking you out to that very expensive place and that we’re now dating because you said so and because you always get what you want.

Do: Tell me if my haircut is off or if they missed a spot (in private).

Don’t: Tell me that my hair looks stupid in front of everyone; that’s just being an asshole.

Get the point? It’s really all about context. Too many times I hear women saying that “people can’t handle my honesty” or something to that nature…that’s just a bullshit excuse. There is a huge difference in being honest and being a fucking asshole.