5 Things Not To Miss About College

1. Money:

I will admit that having a “real world” job is cool in the sense that you don’t need to cross your fingers and hold your breath when the cashier slides your debit card through praying it won’t be declined. I paid more overdraft fees in college than I’d like to admit. The whole 9-5 job isn’t the most fun thing I’ve ever done but not living off of rolls of quarters and recycled beer can money isn’t too shabby.

2. Food:

Cereal was my main food group for the large majority of my college career. In all honesty I didn’t think much of it. Why would Kellogg’s have so many options if not to offer all three meals worth of options? Yet, post college life has reminded me of the existence of such things like vegetables and food that doesn’t come with a toy.

3. Weather:

There was nothing and I mean literally nothing worse than walking to class in the rain or God forbid the snow. Any time I see any form of inclement weather now I thank my lucky stars I don’t need to trudge across campus just to show up late and soaked to a class that I had no idea was cancelled.

4. Alcohol:

Sure at the time half the fun was trying to be sneaky, but it is a little bit of a luxury not having to drink soapy beer like the time freshman year you thought it would be smart to sneak booze into the dorm through an empty jug of Tide. It also is nice to not have to carry your friends up the stairs, then pep talk them sober to make sure their drunk ass doesn’t get “PCed” for the night. You can also now afford alcohol that doesn’t come in a plastic handle, as entertaining as Rubinoff shot-filled nights were.

5. School Work:

Working for a living is certainly a buzzkill at times but I will admit that if I never have to hear the words research or analysis or finals again in my life I wouldn’t hate it. Yes, sometimes my eyes burn at work from staring at the computer blankly for hours like they did in college, but at least I know I can punch out at 5PM and be done. I don’t need to slave away until 4AM bullshitting papers and making all the periods bigger to reach the page requirement. I now just bullshit on an as needed basis.

Bonus – Among Others:

Powerpoint presentations..spending a dillion dollars on Text books…”group” projects..awkwardly seeing people you hooked up with when walking to class… awkwardly seeing people who hooked up with your ex…caring about who hooked up with your ex… parking your car three miles from where you live..awful professors…bad roommates…”drama”…people who used the word “drama”..etc. etc. etc.