Stop Talking About My Relationship Status, Talk About My Success Instead

Girl with success
Unsplash / Bryan Apen

Stop asking me whether there is anyone I am interested in dating seriously. Stop asking me how much longer until I settle down. Stop asking me intimate details about my love life that are not any of your business — and are not any indication of how happy I am.

Ask me about my success. Ask me about how many hours I’ve been working each week. Ask me about how much money I’ve been bringing home. Ask me about the compliments my boss have given me. Ask me about my relationship with my coworkers. Ask me about how my latest meeting went. Ask me about the promotion I have been chasing after. Ask me about whether I feel fulfilled in my career. Ask me where I see myself going in the company. Ask me what I plan on doing with my passion.

Ask me about my level of happiness. Ask me whether I wake up excited or dreading the day ahead. Ask me whether I like the person I see in the mirror or whether I cringe when I catch a reflection. Ask me whether the voice in the back of my head is my best friend or my worst enemy. Ask me how well I have been taking care of myself. Ask me what makes me smile the widest. Ask me about my accomplishments, about my successes.

Ask me about my growth as a person. Ask me about how long it’s been since I’ve engaged in the bad habit I’ve recently given up. Ask me how many times I’ve been to the gym since I’ve gotten my membership. Ask me how many people I have cut out of my life for my own sanity. Ask me how often I read, take baths, treat myself. Ask me how I react when I’m angry now that I’m older and more mature. Ask me how far I’ve come since high school. Ask me how much my morals have changed, shifted, developed.

Ask me who I am on the inside, deep inside my soul. Ask me what is scribbled onto my bucket list. Ask me what I think about when my mind drifts during my 9 to 5. Ask me about the first person I text with good news and bad news. Ask me about what I do during my off hours, when I actually have a second to myself. Ask me what makes me jealous, what makes me upset, what makes me motivated. Ask me what I want from this world. Ask me what I’ve earned from this world.

When you talk to me, ask me something more important than are you seeing anyone? 

Stop acting like whether I’m sleeping with someone consistently is the most important aspect of my universe. Stop pretending that my love life is any of your business. Stop asking me about my status — because there is more to me than my relationship. It’s time you realized how layered I am. It’s time you realized love doesn’t define me. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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