We were attached at the hip, it was almost unhealthy. You were so heavily reliant on me, but I was unable to take care of myself. But that did not stop me from loving you.
We were so young and so naïve. Who would have ever thought it would have blossomed into something so beautiful? The beauty seemed to always appear, but eventually it just faded. Loving words turned into yelling and arguments. Hugs and kisses became rare and longed for. I was craving to feel loved by you the way I once had. I loved you through all your hard times, but you left me during mine.
There was so many times I should have left. I should have just walked away and gotten away from you. I couldn’t. You had this power over me that I will never truly understand. The thought of being without you was worse than the thought of continuing the relationship. No matter what you did or said, I loved you anyway. I loved you through it all. I loved every single bit of you, every inch of you, every flaw about you. I loved you, I valued you, I honored you.
I know I did wrong many times. I am not perfect. But I am human. All I wanted was endless support. I was weak, I’ll admit. I did not love myself, but the love I had for you was all I knew. I had so much trust in you. I put my life in your hands. I never expected you to leave.
But, you did. It seemed so easy for you to just leave me behind, without a single care about what would happen to me. All the trust and love I put into you just seemed to be forgotten and ignored. I felt an immense pain in my chest. I was feeling a type of emotional pain I had never felt before, the kind that brought physical pain along with it.
I needed you. I begged for you. I pleaded. You had made up your mind. I was no longer worthy of your love in your eyes. Hearing you say those words sent sharp pains through my chest. I felt like my life was over.
It has been a month now. I am here to say I am worthy of being loved. I do not regret loving you.
I regret letting myself think you would ever love me the same way.