“A woman’s mind is like a tape recorder.” That’s how I usually start the explanation to whichever friend has had his woman leave him and he simply cannot grasp the situation. If you are female, please keep an open mind. I love women and think I’m onto something here that could create a lot of lasting relationships if the men figure out this concept. The following is the rest of the speech…
When you’re in a long-term relationship with a woman and you do something thoughtless or just plain wrong, she’ll forgive you. She loves you, or else she wouldn’t be in the relationship to begin with. The average male thinks that it’s great that she forgave him and takes that forgiveness as her condoning his behavior. She didn’t mind that much, he thinks, because she forgave him. That must make it OK to engage in that type of behavior. Quite the opposite is true, however.
She did forgive you. However, she did not forget. Nor should she. It is not OK to be a dick to your woman; it is not OK to take her for granted, neglect her, or abuse her. She is the most important thing in your life and should be treated as such, and vice-versa. She stores the event away in her tape-recording of the relationship that began when you got together. Eventually, if you rack up enough bad experiences for her, she’s going to stop the recording and leave you. The idea—if you want to preserve the relationship—is to not fill up the tape to such a point that she decides to sever ties.
When a woman has had enough and decides to terminate the relationship, then the guy usually thinks it’s time to change his ways. Unfortunately for him, the recorder is full. She has made up her mind and that’s that. Now, being armed with this information, there are also good things that can be added to the recording. When you buy her roses for no reason at all but to let her know she’s special to you, for instance. The good things do not outweigh the bad ones, but they’re an important part of the recording.
At this point, usually my friend looks back and sees all of the hurtful behaviors that he engaged in, and even though it hurts, he starts to let go. If I’ve been successful, he applies this knowledge in his future affairs and is a better person for it. Since almost everyone ultimately wants a significant other to spend their life with, we should all spend more time being a better companion. Imagine how much happier we’d all be as a result.