After every episode of This Is Us, people tweet about how they wish they could find a man like Jack Pearson, when really, they should be looking for a man like Toby instead.
You need someone who makes you feel like it’s okay to be you. Someone who sees all of your ‘flaws’ but doesn’t like you any less. Someone who thinks you are intelligent and strong and beautiful, even if you would never use those words to describe yourself. Someone who is convinced they are dating out of their league, even if you would say the same.
You need someone who will support you — whether you are on a weight loss journey or following a path toward your dreams. Someone who wants you to succeed, even if that means seeing you less or taking on more work themselves. Someone who will remind you that you’re capable of anything whenever you start doubting whether all of your hard work has been worth it. Someone who eternally pushes you forward, because they truly believe you have what it takes to live your dream life.
You need someone who will accept your baggage instead of faulting you for it. Someone who will understand there is a reason why you act so closed off at times instead of fighting you whenever you give them the ‘wrong’ answer. Someone who won’t pressure you to talk about the pieces of your past that you are uncomfortable sharing until you are entirely ready. Someone who shows complete respect for you, even when they are pissed off at you.
You need someone who will love you, even when you are still struggling to love yourself. Someone who will compliment your insides and outsides. Someone who will call you the most beautiful woman in the world and mean every word. Someone who will wish you could see yourself the way they see you, because they hate how insecure you are when you have no reason to be.
You need someone who will treat your family like their own family. Someone who will attend every holiday dinner without complaint. Someone who will try their best to impress your mother and siblings. Someone who wants your loved ones to approve of the relationship because they care about anyone you care about.
You need someone who will put never-ending effort into the relationship. Someone who will plan a romantic evening for you without being asked. Someone who will spoil you, even though you don’t expect it. Someone who will remind you of how strong their feelings are every single day so you never feel like you are being taken for granted.
You need someone who will make you laugh until your stomach hurts. Someone who can turn the most boring, mundane activities into a fun adventure. Someone who can make you smile when you are going through the worst moments of your existence.
Despite what you’ve been telling yourself, you don’t need a Jack Pearson. You need a Toby.