This is about how a boy grows up and learns how to become a better man the hard way. This is also about how a boy loves a woman, but can never seem to know or work towards what she really wants from the start. The relationship eventually fails and this note will tell you how everything starts to make perfect sense to the boy only after he moves on.
The relationship ends and when you’re not the one who initiated the break up, often you end up trying everything you possibly can to chase back her in hopes that she will eventually patch back again. At that point, you make so many promises verbally, telling her that you will change for the better but in fact they are just a list of empty promises.
When caught up with so much emotion, you can never be in the condition to think straight. Whatever you say, to you, it probably makes perfect sense, but to your partner, they only sound like a broken record.
When she asks you to move on, as painful as it is, as much as you want to resist it, sometimes it’s for the better. Because she truly understands that if you do not move on, you will never understand the real problem and why your relationship failed in the first place.
Often a boy will have this mentality that as long as he’s nice to a woman, the relationship will work out eventually. But no, this is the wrong mentality. This type of relationship only works if a boy dates a girl, not a woman.
This is my experience and I would love to share them with you. I am the boy who dated a woman. While my relationship lasted for only a year or so, these lessons would stay with me for the rest of my life.
- Act & make decision fast
- Do not disregard minor things because they add up to major things
- Always put her first, care about her feelings and think how your actions can affect her
- Never be selfish
- Whine less, or in fact, DO NOT WHINE AT ALL
- Work harder in life with a goal; work for yourself as well as for her
- Know when to stop asking
- You only get several chances in life, so treasure them
- Never break any promises, be it small or big ones
- Discuss about everything, something minor to you may be important to her
- Be patient
- Encourage her
- Be positive, be optimistic
- Trust her
- Don’t bitch about others to her
- Never throw any tantrums
- Love her more each day
*Not in any particular order and is different for everyone*
The list goes on, but most importantly, you learn from your relationship.
Truth is you will never be able to move on completely, there will always some memories which linger on. You will still think of her every other day, think of the beautiful times you both shared, think of the restaurants you both visited, think of the holidays you both taken and even the fights you never wish to have.
Moving on does not mean that you no longer love this special person anymore. Moving on allows you to see things from a different perspective. Moving on allows you to learn, to see things the way she sees it. Moving on allows you to make the next relationship better. Moving on allows you to grow, from a boy to a man.
While you can’t change yourself overnight, and your ex will never ever know how much you have learnt and grew after moving on. But nobody knows what is going to happen in the future.
As you and your ex start to move on, if fate permits, if both of you are meant to be, moving on might be just a break and at the end of the day, both of you might end up together again.
As for me right now, I am moving on. But deep down in my heart, I believe in kismet.