i’m sorry for the days i forgot to say i’m sorry

for the moments i was too entrenched in rage to flip open a new page,
you begged me for days
and i yearn to say “okay”
to lie to myself in thinking that i’ll change.
i’m sorry i turned out this way, i’m worried;
i may not mean the words i say, but i’ll spit them out anyway
just to compensate.

i know i’m lacking,
i’ll make it up to you but for now, i’m searching for the person within me
to satisfy you.