It’s a shameful feeling we hate ourselves for – to surrender our worth to a network we barely know, care or even like. But their collective judgement matters. It matters in our perpetual pursuit to live glossy lives online.
“For the love of God do not scroll too far back in my Facebook photos. There’s a blatant awkward phase and I’m not sure if unconditional love is possible after that”
Optimism and depression comes in the form of LinkedIn.
Kissing sober would imply you’ve had a significant other (non-feline, that is). But like, where do you even find one? Can’t just pick it up at a Costco.
This is the pinky lifting of small talk.
You regress to being a child as you tiptoe around your tragically unfurnished place but mom is not an option.
You’ve considered dating but like, take out is easier.
I have dabbled in take-out, ventured to frozen/canned meals, explored the questionable terrains known as the campus cafeteria, initiated a lovesick affair with ramen that verged on abusive and plunged half-heartedly into the salad world.
You know Zedd’s hit song Clarity? It’s not a serenade to a timeless lover, no, but a tribute to the sweet minutes of solace when one takes a dump. Yes, I said it.