11 Hilariously Awkward Stages Of Having A Big Fat Crush On Someone


You think about saying ‘Hi!’ and they say ‘hello!’ with a huge smile that you can almost see their cute crow’s feet on their eyes, but you look at it as a beautiful thing because… damn! they’re smiling at you! But in reality, you’re just there around the corner, holding your phone, pretending you’re texting someone but really, you’re just glaring at them, discreetly stalking them and casting a voodoo spell to make them look at you.


You think your life like a rom-com-netflix kind of movie where you will see each other soon. Maybe bump into each other, go get a coffee, become friends, date then boom! You see yourself talking with them on how many kids you’re planning to have.


You try to look good! Stomach-in… check! Double chin-in, leaning head slightly forward…. check! Fixed hair… check! Discreetly checking yourself on your phone’s reflection, pretending you’re texting… check! Cautiously checking your breath even though you can’t even go near them… check!


You think everything about them is goddamn perfect! Like, how perfect and hot they look in their sweats, how genuine and kind and philanthropic they seem to be even though they’ve barely done anything.


You’re completely and utterly sure that you two are a match made from heaven and you’re quite sure that when you eventually, imminently, evidently, inevitably make a baby soon they’re going to look so good! Because damn!


Now, that a little time has passed by before you saw them you carefully plan things on how they can actually notice you. You’re exploring every possible way like bumping onto them, touching their arm and saying you’re genuinely sorry, smiling, saying you’re lost and asking them to show the best coffeehouse in the city. Sadly, all the plans remain plans. You don’t have the guts to even come near them.


You are seriously willing to give up everything you have just to be with them because they’re so fucking perfect!


You have a gut feeling that they MUST look at you. Not just look, but actually check you out because you’ve been making an effort! In reality though? They don’t even know you’re breathing the same oxygen they’re inhaling. *sob*


God damn! Shiiiiiiiiiit!!! What’s more left to say?! You’re actually palpitating right now!


When they leave you literally kind of feel depressed and heartbroken. You even feel like you’re about to cry because saying goodbye to your little infinity with your significant other stranger is totally devastating… You grieve, you felt lost, you’ve never felt like this in your life. It feels like the souls that were once floating on cloud nine is fleeting away… You are kind of frustrated that you can’t do anything. Then just like that, they’re gone. Everything was dark and sad then you bumped onto this stranger who smells like they’re wearing an expensive brand of an eu de toilette… you noticed how hot they look on their perfectly fitted clothes and then at that moment…. you are sure…. that they are the one you’re waiting for!


Then you wake up from your daydreaming and condemn yourself for being the thirsty, hopeless romantic person you actually are.

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