7 Telltale Signs You’ve Found ‘One Of The Good Ones’

Micah Camara
Micah Camara

1. He is not afraid to tell you how he really feels.

PLEASE don’t get annoyed by this. It’s a compliment. Take it!

The dating game rules of today say that being direct is never the answer, and we should beat around the bush and try to pick up on subtleties until we’re sure of the other’s feelings. It can be exhilarating in the beginning, but it gets old FAST (especially if it’s a one-sided game). For this reason it’s easy to get embarrassed and awkward when someone conveys strong emotions toward you. To make it even worse, if someone is willing to put themselves out there it probably means the two of you are close. Do the both of you a favor and take their words gracefully. If you don’t want it to go anywhere, just say that. It may be awkward immediately afterwards, but I promise it will pass if you don’t let it come between you.

So many “men” these days are so hung up on their masculinity and this modern dating game that they’re too scared to open up and risk looking vulnerable (ironic, huh?). While he may still want to portray his “masculine” image to the world, the right guy sees that you are different and therefore worth the risk. Heck, if he’s a really good one, he won’t see it as a risk at all, but more like an investment. What good can come of a relationship started with masks on and walls up, anyway?

2. He doesn’t set deadlines.

Okay, asking you not to be 3 hours late for your 7:30 date night is one thing, but if it seems like it’s always a now-or-never kind of decision with him, the answer definitely needs to be never. This kind of behavior just means you’re dispensable to him, or as Queen Bey said, “[he] could have another you in a minute.” Why would you want someone who is impatient or a constant flight risk? First and foremost, Love is Patient. This is especially valuable in the beginning, but it sure comes in handy for the rest of the relationship, too! Patience shows you’re special to him, and trust me—you ARE special.

3. He tries to better himself for you.

This one here is the sign of a true man. The epitome of Prince Charming. Who doesn’t want Prince Charming?! The right guy shouldn’t have the “take it or leave it” attitude when pursuing you. He knows you deserve only the very best, so if he sees a flaw in himself, he will work to fix it! Now, do NOT confuse this with a guy changing who he is for you. No one should ever change who they are for another person. Here, we are talking about positive adjustments to their life. These are things that probably need to be done anyway, he’s just doing them with you in mind.

4. He consistently pursues from a comfortable distance.

Balance and grace are key here. Being wooed and followed day after day can be annoying, and if it’s out of control, he’s probably confusing love and infatuation. We definitely don’t want that. We want to be equal partners in our relationship! The right guy reminds you of his feelings as much as you need him to, and he does so with dignity. After all, he doesn’t want to push you away!

5. You feel comfortable with him.

No brainer, right? Wrong!!! You know that girl who started dating that one guy and she’s actually super cool but she acts TOTALLY different when he’s around? We all have known her. Don’t be her. You should always be yourself no matter who you’re around, but your significant other is one of the most important. If you can’t be yourself with him, you’re practically setting yourself up for failure! Chances are, he already sees the real you and knows what he’s getting into. Why disappoint by giving him something else?

6. He encourages you to be the best version of yourself.

Similar to #5, he knows you. He knows who you are and what you are capable of doing. He wants so badly to see you shine, and even better, he wants to be a part of the journey. He will be your #1 fan if you let him (next to, like, your grandma). He may not yell and scream in the crowd when you get an award or rock your performance quite like Granny does, but you can guarantee he’s doing it in spirit. Tell him your plans and wildest dream and let him boost you up higher and closer to reaching them. Bonus points if he’s tall.

7. You know you can trust him.

This one is vital. The others are great, but this one is an absolute must. Whether this is going anywhere or staying like it is, there has to be trust. The right guy trusts you, which is why he’s chasing after you and consequently your trust. It’s extremely difficult and miserable to love someone you don’t trust, IF you can ever love them at all. The right guy understands this fact. He will do everything he can to gain, respect, and cherish this trust. Don’t ever take this for granted. Relationship or no relationship, this is special and shouldn’t be lost. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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