You Are Here, Please Stay Here

You are here. It is 11:33 pm and you are here.

But you already knew that and I didn’t have to tell you. And there are other things you know, like that it’s dark outside and that the clock on the wall is ticking softly, counting away the seconds. But there are some things that you don’t know and it’s important that I tell you them before it gets too late.

You contain approximately 7,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 atoms. Each of those atoms are billions of years old. The seven octillion pieces of you have survived through times that no human can remember or begin to imagine. You are made of history and star stuff.

I know that maybe you aren’t happy right now. Despite all of the darkness and the unbearable grief you are feeling, I want to let you know that there is light within you even if you cannot see it yourself. You see, humans are bioluminescent. We give off a dim light so soft that the human eye can’t see it. But it’s there. So, despite the feeling that you are living in a shadow you still contain light within you. Don’t ever forget that.

Maybe you’re seeing the world in black, white, and grey right now but I can assure you that all the colors will return. Your eyes can see up to ten million different colors. You weren’t built to stay this way and you won’t.

Maybe your mind is failing you right now. Aren’t you supposed to be your own best friend instead of your worst enemy? And if so, then why are you having these thoughts that race through your head and curdle your dreams. Even though it doesn’t sound true right now, just know that our brain’s neural pathways change after each new memory. You will feel happiness again and your brain will remember it and grow. You aren’t fated to be this way forever.

Maybe your heart is breaking right now. It feels like there’s this crushing weight that is sitting heavily upon your chest and it aches. But please, please don’t forget that your left lung is smaller than your right lung. It’s smaller to make room for your heart because above all other things, your heart is the most important. It will beat over three billion times in your lifetime and even though it doesn’t feel like it right now, it will keep beating. Don’t give up on your heart because it won’t give up on you.

It is now 11:38 pm and you are still here. You are still here and I know it doesn’t seem like it right now, but everything you’re feeling right now is so small compared to you. Don’t forget what you are made of and how truly brilliant and beautiful you are. After all, you are here and it wasn’t easy to get here. Make sure you stay here.

I love to drink lavender tea and read books.

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