These Are The Ways That I Will Love You

The ways that I’ll love you,
won’t be of grand gestures,
there won’t be promises of moon being pulled down
or have stars named after you,
there won’t be skywritings of my poems written for you,
or an old Volkswagen van painted with an animated version of you all over it.

Because, the ways that I’ll love you,
will not consist much of unexpected surprises,
But, I can assure you that,
there will be days that I will put in an extra twist,
like, making you breakfast in bed,
or draw you a bath with chocolate scented bath salts,
even if chocolates aren’t my thing.

And when I don’t do those,
I’ll still love you in my simpler and quieter ways,
like how, I will give you all of the blanket
when you pulled at it in the middle of the night,
even if it is cold, even if it means I’ll freeze to death.
I will listen to you tell me about the weird things you’ve read online,
and even watch that horror movie that you loved,
even if I hated horror movies.

The ways that I’ll love you,
will not make people around us tell you things like;
“Aww, that is so sweet,” or, “Aww, you are so lucky to have her,”
because I am not much of a PDA kind of person.
I’m more of a send-you-texts-like;
“Get home safe,” and,
“Don’t die because I’ll miss you,” kind of person.
There won’t be loud gestures in public,
but if you noticed, I look at you all the time,
even when we are surrounded by tons of people and loud music and chatters,
I will still look at you,
and be that familiar eyes that you can look for whenever you need reassurance,
in a sea of unknown people.

The ways that I’ll love you,
will be of me crying to you after a bad day,
with loud, ugly sobs and a runny nose,
and of me laughing and snorting when something tickles my bones,
because around you, I won’t have to put up walls,
I will spend my bad days and the best days ever with you,
You’ll get all of me, my strengths and my flaws.
Just as I wish you will allow me to see yours too, even if it takes time.

I’ll love you in a way that,
I won’t say, “Stay with me and don’t go.”,
if you were to go explore on your own,
instead, I will tell you to have tons of fun exploring,
and how I can’t wait for you to story me about them, when you come home.
I will be supportive of you and your adventures.
Just like how I wish you will be supportive of mine.

The ways that I’ll love you,
will not be of me compromising things that are important to me,
just because I want you to be happy.
Or you doing that just to make me happy.
Compromising the little things like,
going to eat at my favorite fast food place even when you disliked it,
or have you pick what to watch on a Friday night, are all okay,
But giving up big things like, hopes for the future, and family;
will never have to happen, no matter how badly we want to
be together, because we will love in a way that sets each other free,
not in a way that leaves us both feeling strangled and stuck.

The ways that I’ll love you,
will not be of me telling you that it’s going to be easy,
because it won’t be.
There will be days that we will feel sick of one another,
and days where we need spaces to clear our heads.
But the ways that I’ll love you,
will start with me, telling you that I won’t give up,
and hold onto that, as long as we are together.

These are the ways that I’ll love you, if you’d allow me to.