19 Things You Learn When You Survive A Long Distance Relationship

 Søren Astrup Jørgensen
Søren Astrup Jørgensen

To all the girls in a long distance relationship, planning on going the distance, or want to know the naked truth of making a long distance relationship actually work: this one’s for you.

1.Take this time alone to learn more about yourself, to define your identity

2. Don’t ditch plans with your friends to wait in your room for his call. His phone call is not a train you’ll miss, but rather a gym, something you can always re-visit at a later time.

3. Your partner is not your crutch to lean on 24/7, they are your…partner. Treat them as such and there will be no feelings of being “used.”

4. You must see each other at least once a month

5. Replace the material gifts with written notes and handmade crafts. This helps keep an intimate connection even from afar.

6. Talk to them on the phone. Every damn day. And be present in a conversation.

7. You are in 2 different cities living your own lives so you may not text as much at times, and that’s OK.

8. Show a little PDA: make him your #mcm. Be his #wcw. Check in to places together on Facebook.

9. Compromises will have to be made. You’ll have to find a happy-medium between what you want vs. what you’re long distance relationship needs

10. There will be uncertainty. This is a long distance relationship, after all. Accept it and stop suffering from the “what if’s.”

11. Have a plan to end the distance. This doesn’t have to be a step-by-step plan, but make sure you both agree on the same plan to get closer.

12. Don’t be afraid of love, don’t be afraid to move. I quit my job twice in hopes of getting near my boyfriend but let my ego and self-judgment get in the way of being in the same city as him.

13. Look forward to traveling together. Long distance relationships are a great excuse to meet up in new cities and create memories together.

14. It takes 2 to tango – You both have to be all in or all out. Not one is all in and one is halfway in. 100% committed effort from both sides.

15. Support each other on your goals – Go after your individual goals and be each other’s, cheerleaders. I supported my boyfriend in starting his own company and my boyfriend supported me in chasing my passion for writing. We both grew from it and our relationship has never been stronger.

16. Envision your future together – How would it look like if you two lived in the same city? Shared a place together?

17. Do NOT bottle things up – What happens when you shake a soda can and open it up? Yea, that’s what will happen. Except instead of fizz that dries off your shirt, it’ll be a word vomit of emotions that will stain the walls of your brain for a minute…or two…

18. Good things come to those who wait -Relationships are like cheese, they taste better with time.

19. Distance does indeed make the heart grow fonder.

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