prison in Microsoft Word, print it, sign it, and mail it out with my
return address. The letters are part niceties, part macabre humor. I
only send female inmates notes, because A) they’re hot chicks and B)
they’re less likely to kill me when they get out. It’s been fun thus far
and I’m really looking forward to inmates’ responses. Here’s my second
TO: Maeghan Rice #265430
PO Box 3300
Goodyear, AZ. 85395
May 17th, 2012
How are you? I hope things are fine. I noticed you are in prison until the year 2020 and were born in 1991. That is a shame to hear. A young mind is a terrible thing to waste. I too know the pains of getting in with the wrong crowd in my youth, only to have it backfire. You seem motivated to change though and I hope that’s the path you’re taking at the moment.
In your profile, you say that you smoke. How do you smoke in prison? I thought that they banned cigarettes in correctional facilities but I could be wrong. Obviously, you would know better than I would. What do you do for fun to pass the time? Do you like to read? If so, what kinds of books?
I feel like if I were in prison, I would work out a lot. Like, a whole lot. If I didn’t have an amazing set of abs and biceps, there’d really be no excuse I could pull out. Know what I mean?
Anyway, I hope after you get out, you finish your education and pursue a degree of some sort. If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?