Being a girl is always complicated, and while we don’t always admit to it we are sometimes the ones causing a lot of the complications. We can often be caught red-handed when it comes to pursuing what we can call silent wars, or wars flickered by our insecurities, attitudes, life goals and deeply buried pasts. Here are five signs you are in a middle of one:
1. You are aware of all the new photos and statuses the other girl posts on any social media. Yes, while I can’t blame you for stalking her seem-to-be perfect life, why not dwell on your own and strive to be perfect in your own eyes? She may have the most likes on her new profile picture, but believe me not even 50% of those likes came from the heart. And as clichéd as it goes… who needs hundreds of fake friends when you’ve got a handful of true and loyal ones.
2. You pity yourself for not being as pretty, smart, and successful as she is. We all want the best for ourselves, but wanting to be like someone (though sometimes aspirational) isn’t always a good idea. While you are constantly envying the things someone else has, you are downing yourself little by little. Remember that there are tradeoffs; whatever you think she has more than you do is paid off by another thing you have and she doesn’t. Who knows — she could be in her room now envying something as minor as the shoes you wore today.
3. You try and spread rumors about her that would probably make her look like a total failure. This is a total no. While you may get the spotlight away from her, this doesn’t assure that you will be getting the attention soon; and not only are you putting her to shame, you’re risking you’re own humiliation and disappointment.
4. You imitate most (if not all) of the things she’s doing. Just because it is working for her doesn’t mean it’s going to work for you too; and do you really want to be a copycat? One thing that probably gives her a boost on the social or whatever ladder you’re having a war on is her uniqueness, and her adherence to her own standards. Counter that by thinking out of the box, and staying true to who you really are.
5. You fake a smile, a hi, a congratulations or any other friendly gesture. You could be friends with the very enemy you’re at war with. And worse, you could be telling her every lie in the world about her cute top or how her new hair color compliments her eyes. But deep down inside, you’re wishing you had whatever she’s wearing or your cursing every pinch of her stylish bone. If you are friends with her, try and be happy for her — and I mean really happy. Instead of counting the things that she has and you don’t, start counting the things you have and be happy for yourself.