Thought Catalog

The Never Ending Cycle Of Love And Heartbreak

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@canipel
@canipel

“I can’t unlove you, but I can love you differently.”

Remember when you first met him and everything felt as though it was in slow motion?

You got those feelings, the warm and fuzzy ones, the one’s that make your instincts whisper “Gosh, I love him.”

It’s almost like a whirlwind.

Your mind is completely, and utterly consumed with the thought of him. As much as you try, it just doesn’t stop.

You saw it when the lights were out.

It’ll sink deep into your soul late at night, which causes you to spend countless hours tossing and turning fiercely craving his embrace.

You felt it on the way home.

The first time you leave his house, you’ll take the long way home, because you can’t help but want to replay the events of the night in your head.

You heard it in the silence.

The silence says so much, so much more than your mind and heart could ever process. It’s the intensity of the silence that sends chills down your spine.

You’re so madly, foolishly, and insanely in love.

Something good will happen in the middle of the day and you’ll instantly call him over anyone else because he’s your person.

The butterflies you got when you first saw his car make its way up your driveway.

You watched as he made his way to your place. You patiently waited to fall apart in his arms, because you missed him so much. His hug never failed at sending shockwaves throughout your whole body.

As time goes on, and you sink into your everyday routine, things begin to shift.

The butterflies don’t flutter as much and the extreme energy finally calms down.

It’s not that you don’t love him, because you do, you love him so much, but it’s not the blissful, and perfect beginning anymore.

You get more sleep because you’re genuinely happy.

Then one day, that familiar strong love will make its appearance. Everything hits you all at once. You’ll glance at him across the room and think, “How could I ever love anyone else?” You’ll then quickly fall right back into that comfortable state, and that feeling will slow down.

Our minds process falling in love the same exact way our minds process heartbreak.

Suddenly, you’re sitting at the end of your bed, with your face in your hands, and desperately trying not to fall apart.

Everything feels like it’s going in slow motion.

Your instincts whisper, “Gosh, I love him.”

You’re back in that whirlwind where it all began.

Your mind is unconditionally consumed with the thought of him.

Once again, you saw it when the lights were out.

It’ll sink deep into your soul late at night, which causes you to spend countless hours tossing and turning fiercely craving their embrace.

Once again, you felt it on the way home.

The final time you leave his house, you’ll take the long way home, because you can’t help but replay the events of the night in your head.

Once again, you heard it in the silence.

The silence says so much, so much more than your mind and heart could ever process. It’s the electricity that sends chills down your spine.

You’re so madly, foolishly, and insanely heartbroken.

Something good will happen in the middle of the day and you’ll instantly pick up to phone to call him, but you have to remind yourself, he’s not your person anymore.

The butterflies you got when you watched him make his way up your driveway that final time.

You watched him walk to your place one last time. You wished you could just fall apart in his arms just like you had a thousand and one times before.

And because you know his hug never failed at sending shockwaves throughout your whole body.

As time goes on, and you sink into your everyday routine, things begin to shift.

The butterflies don’t flutter as much and the extreme energy finally calms down.

It’s not that you don’t love him, because you do, you love him so much, but it’s not the tortuous beginning of the breakup anymore.

You get more sleep because you’re genuinely happy.

Then one day, that familiar strong love will make its appearance. Everything will hit you all at once. You’ll come across something as a little as a familiar scent and think, “How could I ever love anyone else?”

But, you’ll then quickly fall back into that comfortable state, and that intensity will slow down.

Love and heartbreak are one in the same.

You never stop loving, but you learn to love differently, you learn to love from afar.

Listen to yourself, trust yourself, and most importantly love yourself. TC mark

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