I am currently at a weird stage in my life. One where I crave independence but also one where I can’t seem to let go of. I’m at a point in my life where I am being demanded to act like a grown up but I’m also being yelled at for wanting to work during the nighttime or for talking back. I would say it’s partly my fault. I have spent the majority of my life living through other people’s eyes and living too comfortably. I have been a primary character in everyone else’s movie for too long that I forgot I need to direct my own.
I don’t have a clear vision of what my future will look like, but I do have an idea of what I should do in order to be successful, in order to be happy. People often forget that we are the only ones with the responsibility of shaping our own lives; we decide if we want to move on or stay stuck. We are the only ones capable of making that shift.
The ones who forget that are often the people who greatly influenced the person you are today, people who were part of your growing up process. People who helped you for so long they forgot you are your own person and you have a life of your own. Sometimes, without even realizing it, they will hinder your growth. Not on purpose, but because they are being exposed to a whole new environment, and remember that change always scares people. Your whole life you needed them, and now suddenly you don’t need them as much anymore.
Suddenly, you have this desire to make a name for yourself. It’s tough. However, it is normal, and it is something most of us will go through or have gone through at some point in our lives. If you want to get things done, if you want to find out more about yourself, if you want to explore your options, if you want to go on a quest of finding your passion, then you have to let go and simply do it on your own. You should be allowed to make your own decisions and make as many mistakes as you possibly can. You shouldn’t feel guilty for it, because at the end of the day all you really have is yourself. Why not make yourself the main focus?
If you feel it in your heart that it is time to “fly away,” as some say, then prove it to yourself and the rest of the world that you can and will do it. Growing up doesn’t mean neglecting all of those who have loved, supported, and mentored us throughout our journeys. Growing up means taking in all those lessons and all that love and support as the fuel to get things done and to put yourself first.