Happiness Starts With You, Not Your Relationship

Flickr/55Laney69
Flickr/55Laney69

So many individuals I know, and am acquainted with, revolve their heart around their significant other. Which yes to an extent you need to but to the point where you lose yourself, and don’t know how to be happy without that significant other isn’t healthy. Love is a powerful thing, and sometimes you will be willing to do anything for that individual so they stay, even if that means losing your identity in the process.

I used to be like this as well, when I had a boyfriend I would adapt myself to HIS ways, I would drop friends he didn’t like and for the friends I kept.. I would never see them because I was too focused on him. I would stop doing hobbies he didn’t like and started doing hobbies he enjoyed only. There was never a balance. Sadly, everything is temporary. Your life, your house, the weather, pleasure, your boyfriend/girlfriend.. is all temporary. So is doing all of this really worth it for someone who will only be in your life temporarily? No.

When you commit all of these changes, you start losing your true self, and then you can’t imagine what happiness would be like without that significant other in your life. And then, when that individual dies, breaks up with you, cheats on you, etc… You’re lost. You feel like you can’t move on in life and spend your time mourning over him. But here is not what most people think during that time.. “I was fine before him… I will be fine after”. Yes, that’s a line that has been said a lot and most of you have probably heard, but it’s true. Your life will move on.

Relationships aren’t the core of your life, there is so much more to life then revolving your heart around a significant other. You need to learn how to be happy with yourself, and learn how to think for yourself before allowing another individual into your life. True happiness is out there, but it isn’t with someone, it’s with something. Now don’t get me wrong, relationships do bring happiness, but to an extent.

True happiness is something that is permanent, never ever define your happiness over another human being, because you are just setting yourself up for ultimate disappointment. I learned this the hard way, and now I have developed a tone of hobbies that make me happy, so if my man ever leaves me.. yes I will be sad for a bit but I will be able to move on with my life much easier because I know I will be okay.

Stay Strong. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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