How To Embrace Your Imperfections

Twenty20.com / Kat Billings
Twenty20.com / Kat Billings

To embrace your imperfections, first let go of identifying yourself as inadequate. Then embody the wholeness of your being.

Consider the accompanying narrative of how our imperfections can be channeled correctly:

A water bearer had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole that he carried across his neck. One pot had a crack in it while the other was perfect and consistently delivered a whole portion of water.

One day, at the end of the long walk from the stream to his house, the water bearer’s cracked pot arrived half full. This continued daily for two years, with the bearer bringing home one-and-a-half pots of water.

The perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the cracked pot was embarrassed by its imperfection since it fulfilled only a fraction of what it was designed for.

After two years of what it regarded as disappointment, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the river. “I’m ashamed of myself because this crack in my side causes water to leak all the way back to your house.”

The bearer replied, “Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side? That’s because I’ve always known about your flaw. I sowed flower seeds on your side of the path and every day on our walk back to the house, you watered them. For two years I’ve picked these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being the way you are, I wouldn’t have this beauty to decorate the house.”

What you regard as limitations are good fortune clothed as hardship. When applied correctly, they can transform your life.

Accept yourself completely, knowing you possess a combination of qualities. Instead of bringing attention to your weaknesses, view them as gifts to transform into the wholeness of your being.

It’s pointless to strive becoming someone you’re not. To maintain a facade over time is exhausting and strips you of your authentic self.

We are not attracted to others because of their virtues; their wholeness of character is what resonates with us most.

Consider being in a room of attractive people and notice the tendency to fixate on your own faults. It’s human nature to measure ourselves against others, though we need not subjugate our self-worth.

In The Self Illusion: Why There is No ‘You’ Inside Your Head, author Bruce Hood states:

In fact, it is the favourable comparisons that we draw against others not in our group that help to define who we are. This is how we formulate our identity—by focusing on what we are not. The trouble is that by focusing on others, we miss our own imperfections.

To accept your imperfections, cease trying to satisfy others. The more you aim to please, the less people are inclined to identify with you, because people-pleasing is a powerless state.

There are several leading actors and successful entrepreneurs with notable imperfections which they used to their advantage. Consider Arnold Schwarzenegger’s heavy accent, which didn’t discourage him from becoming Hollywood’s most prominent star. Similarly, Richard Branson’s dyslexia had little hindrance when he was establishing his thriving billion-dollar Virgin empire.

While I acknowledge the following wisdom is often given out, it is underutilized owing to its simplicity. The power of gratitude can help us to realise the wholeness of our character. A blemish on an apple does not make it inedible; it gives it further appeal.

Equally, vulnerability allows us to embrace our imperfections because we communicate the same intention to others. It shows our humanness, given that perfection is an unattainable ambition if we wish to lead an authentic life.

Without doubt, what you look for, you are certain to encounter.

We must be mindful of our shortcomings yet still bring our greatest work to life. As a further example, the actor Sylvester Stallone was once advised that his slurred speech would pose an obstacle to becoming an onscreen actor. Nevertheless, he channelled that objection to create a streak of successful films playing the lead character Rocky Balboa, the impoverished boxer hailing from the slums of Philadelphia.

So welcome your imperfections and stop regarding them as an impediment. Delight in them, while impacting the lives of others.

At some stage in our life, we subscribe to a distorted image that portrays people as perfect. Perhaps the media plays a role, yet this image is far removed from reality.

We must let go of striving for perfection and accept our true identity. We are complex beings and our physical appearance is one facet of our being. If we fixate on our imperfections while downplaying other aspects, we overlook the wholeness of who we are.

Consider viewing a masterpiece painting close up. Your attention is drawn to the bold brushstrokes that appear distracting to the eye. Yet when you step back and view the painting from afar, you realize the beauty and complexity of those brushstrokes that appear to outline the entire picture.

See yourself as a masterpiece beyond your shortcomings, replete with bold brushstrokes that complete the whole person.

Our imperfections call us to exercise self-compassion with our inner critic.

Don’t abandon yourself when the inner critic judges your imperfections. See it as an opportunity to love and accept the disapproving part of you, instead of waging war. With concentrated attention, we reframe our inner dialogue to be more affirming.

We must honor our feelings and use them to examine what inflames our emotions. In this manner, we transform our inner dialogue to reaffirm our wholeness instead of focusing on our separateness.

You are born to be real, not perfect.

There is no personal growth in a Utopian world and the last time I checked, we are a great way off from Heaven, Nirvana, or Paradise. We must quietly evolve into the highest version of ourselves.

Perfection is not the answer if we aspire to attain inner peace. It will lead us further astray because we’ll continuously strive to change aspects of ourselves we’re unhappy with.

Gratitude, however, opens the doorway to acceptance and a heart-centred focus.

In conclusion, your imperfections are based on an illusory perception that highlights one facet of your being.

You must welcome your imperfections so the wholeness of who you are is realized.

After all, it was Martin Luther King Jr. who declared:

Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. TC mark

Tony Fahkry

Self-empowerment author, expert speaker and coach.

Words That Heal 💙

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  • http://mylifeasishan.wordpress.com mylifeasishan

    This is an amazing blog post

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