1. The friend who picks you up at the airport
Sure, they didn’t really have much of a choice in picking you up, but there’s never a good time to pick someone up from the airport. It seems that most planes land either in the middle of the afternoon when everyone is working, or so late in the evening that even a small delay rapidly increases the chances of them falling asleep at the wheel after picking you up. Then when this hero goes to pick someone up they’ll receive the premature text that says, “We just landed.” This unexperienced traveler wasn’t accounting for the extra 45 minutes shuttling around the runway. Don’t forget to add on the time spent deboarding: A process that questions a man’s faith in humanity. By the time these heroes actually try to pick up these ready-to-complain passengers, they’ve almost ran out of gas due to circling the arrivals and departures section. This very section is where security guards will be constantly yelling at you to move along even though you’re trying to use the section per its definition.
2. The designated driver
Anyone who has done this job knows how truly awful drunk people can be. Whilst drunk, other drunks are awesome. In fact they’re the only other people you want to be around. When you’re the sober one, however, a car full of drunks is your worst nightmare. The toughest part of being the designated driver isn’t necessarily the driving while not intoxicated part. Driving is wicked simple: they let 15 and 16-year-olds do it. The annoying part is oftentimes the waiting they have to do while the drunks attempt to assemble and come outside. Drunks are not known for their impeccable punctuality.
Sometimes designated drivers are not just a ride. Sometimes they’ll spend the entire night out sober while everyone else gets hammered. The crazy thing is that everyone will mock this designated driving hero for not drinking, even though they’re the only way home. Give this unsung hero some money, or at least do them the decency of not yacking in their backseat.
3. People who don’t automatically call the cops for noise complaints
If you give a person a party, they’re going to want to hear some music. If you give a party enough music, they’re going to want it to play louder. If you want the music to play louder, you’ll be responsible for handling the noise complaint ticket when the cops come knocking. This is a sad tale that happens far too often. But an unsung hero doesn’t call the cops at the first sign of a subwoofer tremble.
Now, it’s a different story if someone has already attempted to warn you about the noise or you’re consistently blaring Slayer every night at 4am. However, if a neighbor tends to get a tad loud once in a blue moon, an unsung hero will suck it up and consider the people’s good time they would be impeding upon. Cops are often thought of as heroes, but the true heroes are the people who suck it up and deal with the noise for one night so everyone else can enjoy the party.
4. The person who owns/drives the boat
Everyone loves being on a boat in the summer. The only problem is finding someone who is willing to haul the boat out to the water and drive you around while you get plastered on Bud Light Limes that go down like water in the hot summer sun. People always fail to recognize the sacrifice this person makes. This is like being the designated driver on steroids. Instead of offering a quick ride or hanging out for a few hours at the bar, he or she is volunteering to spend an entire day remaining sober all while burning the gasoline they already paid for. The least you can do is let this person play whatever music they want through the stereo. Chances are the one who owns the boat also owns a truck, which brings me to my next unsung hero.
5. The friend who helps you move only because they have a truck
You think you’re the first person who’s asked them for help moving? The biggest mistake you can make in your early twenties is buying a truck, because you’ll be contractually obligated to help every one of your friends move. It’s a lose-lose. If you say you can’t help you’re a dick, and if you help out your back will be ruined and you’ll lose an entire day of your life. “I actually don’t have that much stuff” is code for, “I have a lot of stuff, and it’s very hard to get in and out of my place.” The worst part is when people think an acceptable form of payment is a few slices of pizza and a beer. I mean I’m all for a pizza and beer currency, but moving is an all-day affair. In pizza and beer currency that’s like three 30 packs, 4 large pizzas, and a side of cheesy bread change at least.
So the next time one of these heroes crosses your path (and they will) let them know how much you truly appreciate their courageous acts. It’s time they got the credit they deserve.