1. “Find a partner who loves you for who you are.”
Fuck that! Deep down I am very lazy, selfish, and hate cleaning. I have to work every day to be someone who worth building a life with. Instead, find someone who wants the best version of you, a version that always want to improve themselves.
2.“Treat people the way you want to be treated.”
Straight up bullshit. You don’t have to be kind to everyone, but do so until they did something that justifies you to treat them otherwise. Learn to put people in their place.
3. “In order to heal, you have to be able to forgive.”
Not only is that flagrantly not true, it also puts the victims of abuse in a weird position where they feel like they must forgive their abuser or else they’ll never be ok. It’s a really terrible idea to put into a trauma survivor’s head.