46. Server: “Can I get you guys anything else?”
My Dad: “You got anything for free?” Arms folded across his stomach, deep barrel chest laugh
47. When at a restaurant:
Server: How is/was everything?
Dad, motioning at clear plate: Terrible. You should take it back and have them make another.
Everyone does a rolling eye laugh. Server brings the check.
Dad: Is this negotiable?
Every damn time.