24. Told my friend about a dream I had where I kissed her. Her reaction was basically “hahaha what. Well was it a wet dream?” and I thought holy shit maybe it was.
Then it all made sense. As a child I’d become enamoured by certain girls, never guys. They were the only ones I found physically attractive. I’d make lesbian couples in the sims (one time I made a sim of me marry a girl) and it was just kinda fascinating to me? Turns out I’d been crushing on girls my whole life and hadn’t realized it until my friend harmlessly teased me about it.
25. Cranking it in 4th grade and realizing I was focusing on the dude and not the girl. I remember going about 2 years saying to myself, “It’s not gay I just like the way the muscles look.” Eventually I had to face the facts and say “Okay, you’ve been beating off to dudes for the past 14 months, that’s pretty gay.”