1. I accidentally grabbed Renée Zellweger’s boob.
“I was working on a behind the scenes featurette for a movie starring Keanu Reeves and Renée Zellweger. I had to wire the lav under Renee’s shirt and clip it to her bra, and I totally accidentally grabbed her boob. She looked me right in the eye and said, ‘Jeez, buy me a drink, OK?’”
2. Tom Cruise saw my cousin’s dick.
“A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, my uncle owned a restaurant in a small Alaskan town. One time Tom Cruise was up there filming some movie (I can’t remember which one) and had dinner at the restaurant. He dropped his camera at the table, and my uncle being the owner took the lost and found home every night. When Tom called the restaurant to get his camera, they told him to go to my uncle’s house to pick it up. He headed over there, and while standing at the front door thanking my uncle my cousin came running down the stairs butt-naked. So he can now always say ‘Tom Cruise saw my dick.’”
3. My friend snuck a peek at Shaq’s junk.
“Friend was pissing next to Shaq at a club in Miami. Of course he can’t keep his eyes on the road, and tried to sneak a peek at Shaq’s junk. Shaq turns to him, smiles and says, ‘Crazy right? Big ni**a, regular dick.’”