12. One of her pet rats ran up my leg.
“During college—hooked up with a girl I’d met at a party, I get to her place and some older dude she lived with gave me the third degree (protective friend/roommate, not her brother/random male relative as I suspected) and we go up to her room. Shitty old house, dead of January at about 1am, it’s freezing outside and I could see my breath in the entryway of the house, fogging up between myself and the TV across the living room. Could already tell it was messy. We get upstairs to her room, everything looks like it was last updated in 1979; ‘wood’ paneling, brown shag carpet, stained drop ceilings. Her room is a total disaster, piles of clothes etc everywhere. I wanted to nope out then, but yknow, the instinct got overridden by the instinct. Then I hear a rustling from the corner and see she’s got some pet rats. Imo anyone who keeps odd pets is bound to be odder the deeper you go, but then I hear rustling outside the cage, like near me. She giggles at how startled/tense I look and tells me it’s fine, a couple of the rats got loose and they’re chilling among the dirty clothes/empty containers and boxes around the room. One of the rats proceeded to run out of the detritus and right up the outside of my leg, nearly getting inside the hem of my shirt before I smacked it off.
THAT, my friends, was when I noped out.
She ended up being a maniac who wanted to keep in close touch despite it being a failed hookup and I had to totally ghost her. The end.”