15 Things Men Wish Every Woman Knew About Relationships

@criene

1. Make both people happy.

Don’t make rules, make agreements.

2. It’s important to be affectionate.

Enjoy each other and express your joy. Couples that stay together have a much higher ratio of little happy moments in their day (saying hello, kisses, a touch on a shoulder, a smile, a compliment) vs unhappy moments compared to couples that don’t stay together. Plus it’s just nice.

3. Don’t go to bed angry.

Do not go to bed angry.

When I first wanted to get married, my relationship was not perfect and I set out to fix it the best that I could. The first thing that I learned is that is perfectly acceptable to go to bed angry.

Two people trying to resolve a disagreement when they are tired and irritable is more likely to make things worse. People think more clearly when they have had rest. In fact, sometimes going to sleep is just the thing you need to take care of an argument. The likelihood that you will still be upset when you wake up is very slim and you can talk with your partner more rationally when you need to instead of trying to force an ultimatum before bed time approaches.

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Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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Image Credit: @criene