6. She pretended she was pregnant and made someone else’s baby suck on her titties to convince me she had my baby.
“I broke up with a girl, I use the term broke up with loosely because I thought we were friends with benefits and she took it a little more serious.
Anyways, she said that she was pregnant, I know, only a little crazy. But she maintained this for about 9 months, she would send me pictures of ultra sounds, and after the baby was born, she’d send pictures of her breastfeeding, and in little outfits. She maintained all of this until the baby was about a week old and I asked for the paperwork to have the kid added to my benefits, and a DNA test.
Once I tried to do what I thought was the right thing, despite my freaking the fuck out, it came out that it was her friend’s baby. Fucking bitch was nuts!
TL;DR: crazy sorta ex pretended she was pregnant and made someone else’s baby suck on her titties to convince me she had my baby.
I had another girl who was into ass to mouth. Well one day she decided “Now’s a good time to suck his poop pecker” and proceeded to immediately spit something out, and go back at it. It sounded like she was spitting out a watermelon seed. In the moment I didn’t think much of it, but after the lights came on, there was a piece of brown lettuce stuck to the wall. I ended up having to repaint so I would stop seeing it.
Edited: added another story I was told should be in the original post.”