1. He spiked my drink himself so he could ‘save me’ and show me how caring he was.
“I once was out with friends and my drink was spiked. One dude stayed with me to take care of me and my other friends left because we all knew him. Turns out he spiked my drink himself so he could ‘save me’ and show me how caring he was.
Edit: since people are asking how I found out, he told a mutual friend thinking that the guy would think it was a cool move. Our friend did not think it was cool, and told me what happened.
This dude also laced the one-hitter we were using with something that same night. I could have died, but he really thought he was being a genius pick up artist. The worst part is that we had actually been talking for a week or so before this—I clearly already liked him, and he still felt the need to do this.
Keep your eyes on your drink and trust your instincts.”
2. I ended up breaking up with him and getting a restraining order after he threatened to shoot me.
“I dated my ‘nice guy’ best friend in undergrad who swore he was ‘different from other guys’ after being there for me after a couple of failed relationships. I ended up breaking up with him and getting a restraining order after he threatened to shoot me. Not saying you shouldn’t give people a chance, but you should always stay wary.”
3. He would message me about how I looked really good when he saw me from his car while I was walking in my neighborhood.
“This guy I used to see around town at different events had evidently built me up in his mind and it was pretty confusing at first then scary. I saw him probably 2-3 times a week at different shows/hangouts but we never exchanged a word. Someone introduced us once but then we both moved on. He added me on FB and we would chat a bit on there about shows/life , people we were dating etc. I started to get serious with someone and would mention my partners name here and there , talk about what we did over the weekend . Eventually the guy starts sending me obscene messages , telling me his sexual fantasies and what he thinks my skin would feel like etc. I asked him to stop and he wouldn’t and instead suggested I only wanted him to stop because the guy I was seeing was controlling. I told him to get lost (kindly at first ) then more forcefully. I told my partner about what was going on and he expressed a lot of concern and offered to talk to the guy but I wanted to handle it. He messaged me later to tell me when he saw my partner going to work at night (even noting ‘he wore s flannel shirt today, right?’), he would message me about how I looked really good when he saw me from his car while I was walking in my neighborhood. I let my partner know that this guy knew where we lived and worked so we should be careful. It was stressful but I outed him to our mutual friend and it died down.”