43. We will only ever be valued as a paycheck in the eyes of the family court system.
“I got a subpoena today for family court. I was there once with my ex after my first child. In mediation, the volunteer law student (a female), talked my ex into saying she feared me despite no abuse (neither verbal nor physical) or hints of abuse indicated by my ex. It sucks being a man because despite both my ex and I having just enough to get by, she’s most likely going to end up with about 20% of my income. This will force me into either living with my parents, at 30, or I’ll have to move into an area ridden with gang violence. My ex neglects washing my kids, brushing their teeth (my six-year-old lost 2 molars to cavities, despite me flossing and brushing every night when they’re with me.), and apparently reading to my children is ‘my thing,’ so learning is my unique agenda for my kids. However, in the State of Wisconsin, it’s a mother’s state, and judges routinely rule against men. I could only surmise the reason is that men tend to work more and the family court cuts administrative fees as part of child support. The sad thing is that this subpoena is for my 2nd and youngest child who has a wayyyy stronger bond with me than her mom. My ex gave up breastfeeding before leaving the hospital and I took a month of paternity leave and was up every night with her. Even when my ex quit her job shortly after the birth, I would work 16 hour shifts and come home and take care of my baby girl. We’ve been inseparable since my youngest was born. I take care of my girls every day of the week whether I work or not, and sometimes don’t sleep after forced 16 hour shifts just to be there. I don’t know what I’ll be able to do, but I know the courts will at best be neutral towards me. The best I’ve ever heard a man doing in WI is getting split placement and they always owe tons of money. Even in cases where the mom is a habitual opiate abuser with a criminal record, moms win in court and take money even if they forfeit placement.
TLDR: Trying to be a super active father and strong role model means nothing in family court. You’ll only ever be valued as a paycheck in the eyes of the family court system. At least in Wisconsin.”
44. We are not allowed to be depressed.
“You’re not allowed to be depressed.”
45. We get no attention for the diseases men get.
“The lack of attention to diseases men get. You see pink all over the place for the Susan G. Komen for the Cure. However, no attention is paid to the fact that men can also get breast cancer, and there’s colon cancer, testicular cancer, prostate cancer etc. etc. I know there is Movember (Not shaving in November to raise awareness for cancers that men get) but zero attention is paid to it. Nobody gives a fuck when a man commits suicide- he’s supposed to be strong. Men can be sexually assaulted and raped too, yet many will deny it. So fucked up. Also if we look at a kid for longer than 2 seconds = pedophile.”
46. We are disposable.
The world does not care about men the same way it cares about women.
A woman dying violently is a hate crime; a man dying violently is a Tuesday.”
47. We’re expected to do all the manual labor.
“Always being asked to do manual labor around the office (or in general).”