When it comes to awkward truths, Lilly Singh can always be counted on to say out loud what the rest of us are silently grumbling to ourselves. As part of our WORDS TO LIVE BY series—a partnership with YouTube featuring our favorite Lilly Singh videos—we bring you this hilariously accurate depiction of what’s really going through our heads during dates. Anyone who’s ever kinda wished they could go into #nofilter mode will relate all too well.
And as long as we’re being honest, here are some things we’ve thought (and wanted to say) on dates:
“Can you stop bouncing your leg?!”
– Johanna, on a date with someone whose nerves were causing him to shake the entire table.
“I’m sorry, I actually haven’t registered a single thing you’ve said for the past ten minutes because you’re frustratingly good looking. Can you start that entire story from the beginning?”
– Sophie, while talking to a dude with problematically good looks.
“Is this the first time you’ve done your own makeup?”
– Jeff, to a former model whose foundation was markedly darker than her skin tone resulting in a visible line on her jaw all the way to her chin.
“I’ve been making the ‘please ask me to hang out after this’ face for literally twenty minutes now because I don’t want to be the one to say it. So…please ask me to hang out after this!”
– Jake, in a failed attempt to send subtle social cues.
“Looks like your ex made the right call breaking up with you…”
– Ari, with someone who spent the entire night talking about what a horrible person his ex was, including saying, “you actually kind of look like her, but here’s hoping you’re not a b****!”
“Please tell me you can’t tell how much I already know about you via my extensive social media stalking.”
– Kate, on every date ever.