This Is What Heartbreak Feels Like As A Closeted Gay

Steven Depolo
Steven Depolo

You will have to change your ringtone for all your texts because as soon as the old ring tone rings, it will remind you of him. 

You will stop eating out because every restaurant name reminds you of him. 

You will look at TV shows and feel so gross, disgusting, and nasty because all of them has memories linked to them.

You will cuddle your big fat plush mouse and it will remind you of how he put his hand over you. 

You will look at the sky and simply shout to the void that you don’t want to remember anymore. 

You will think about getting back to him, but then the fact that he hurt you will confirm the otherwise. 

You will tell yourself things will get better but after three weeks you will still nostalgic like it was yesterday. 

You will stop sleeping because you are tired of dreaming about the guy who will hold you tight and then suddenly wake up in the middle of the night and realize you are all alone in this world. 

You will look through your Facebook friend list, looking for a friend you feel trusted enough to tell things to but then realize all of them are not really homo-friendly. 

You will cry and you will break down in most of your lectures no matter how interesting the lecture is or how complex a peroxide molecule is, you will cry. 

You will grab yourself back up and you will wipe your own tears that you shed for the person who can’t be to wipe them for you and tell yourself to get over him. 

Finally, you will walk through the park on your campus, looking at the sky and know that everything will be okay and that one day, someone will love you as much as you loved him. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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