Embrace Who You Already Are, Not Who You Think You Should Be

We spend so much of our lives trying to become who we think other people want us to be. We pour our energy into being the “perfect” person in hopes that this will make us more well-liked and accepted. It becomes a constant yo-yo of trying to understand exactly who we should be in order to fit the golden mold of society – more outgoing? More reserved? More career-driven?  More laid back? More spontaneous? More compassionate? More assertive?

It’s exhausting. It’s draining. And in striving to morph into this perfect person, we are instead creating an inauthentic version of who we were meant to be. Each of us has a radiant heart that was made to stand out from any other person. We have unique gifts and personalities and energies that bring a specialness to this world and we truly are doing ourselves and others a disservice by blocking the flow of that.

If you enjoy sitting at home by yourself on the weekends and reading, that’s ok. If you enjoy being with all your friends and going to the bar on the weekends, that’s ok. If you thrive in a big group of people and carrying the conversation, that’s ok. If you thrive by doing more listening than talking and simply observing the conversation, that’s ok. If you aspire to climb your way to the top of the corporate ladder, that’s ok. If you aspire to be a stay-at-home mom, that’s ok.

Because you see, my friend, you are already perfect just the way you are. You are already full of a stunning, magnetic light that others are naturally drawn to. And it’s up to you to allow that light to shine. It’s when this happens that you will truly feel seen and accepted by others. It’s when you learn to love yourself – every awkward, wonderful, shame-ridden, beautiful part of you – that you give others the permission to love and embrace you as well.

So, shed the belief that you need to turn outwards for validation of who you should be and instead turn inwards for reassurance of who you already are.

About the author
Just a girl on a mission to live an extra sparkly, love-filled life Follow Tess on Instagram or read more articles from Tess on Thought Catalog.

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