Latest Posts

7 Tips For Surviving This Holiday Weekend

The holidays trudge up a lot of negative memories and associations, like the time your parents got you a geological rock kit for Christmas. These negative memories are deeply rooted, unresolved emotional scars that you probably shouldn’t be picking at.

What’s Our Excuse For The 2000s?

The ‘60s are similar, in that living through them apparently gave people the right to do things that are now considered morally and legally objectionable. However, the people who lived through this era of decadent drug use and sexuality are now in positions of authority requiring them to condemn today’s youth for the very same activities.

Rejected SAT Analogies, Spring 2012

Yes, this is inspired by the SAT analogies segment from Late Night with Conan O’Brien. Yes, I’m aware that the SATs no longer have analogies. Yes, I remember the episode of Full House where D.J. takes the SATs. Yes, according to Saved by the Bell, Zack Morris got a 1502 on his SATs. No, that is not possible.

What Freud Would Have Done If He Had Facebook

I’m paid to analyze the most trivial thoughts and irrelevant events in the lives of complete strangers, and even I don’t care about this. I’d rather watch a Celebrity Rehab marathon than spend another second dealing with the worthless drivel you post in your “updates.”

  1. 1
  2. ...
  3. 10
  4. 11
  5. 12
  6. 13
  7. 14
  8. 15
  9. 16
  10. 17