Breakups are something no one ever wants to talk about or go through. It feels like you’ve just had a part of you ripped away, especially if it wasn’t a mutual choice.
For most of us the healing process usually doesn’t involve healing. We self-medicate ourselves with people and things. Especially for us as women, we can’t be alone. We need someone there with us even if we don’t like the person.
But why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we need to replace things to feel better? The problem lies within our own hearts, it’s something we have to deal with alone.
It’s so important to take this time to be alone to work on yourself and even find yourself. If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time with someone, it’s possible your identity was intertwined with his or hers. Now it’s time to do some soul searching and go on a journey to find you again.
1. Don’t blame yourself. I’ve done this before and it just sends you into a spiral of regret, anger, and guilt. The breakup was probably for the best. If someone isn’t treating you like the king or queen you are, then he or she wasn’t worth it in the beginning.
2. Delete their number. This will be the death of you if you don’t do this. By having your ex’s number still within reach, you will feel inclined to reach out to them. I’ll admit when I broke up with my ex seeing his number in my phone made me second-guess my decision. I even went so far as calling and leaving a voicemail on his phone. Big mistake.
3. Surround yourself with positive, uplifting people. When you have people to basically keep you in check and encourage you, the decisions you make are now reason-based instead of emotionally driven. The friends and family that play a positive role in your life will help guide you through this journey.
4. Put yourself first. It’s hard to do this, but remember to put yourself first. No matter what happens in life remember that your well-being, health, and happiness always comes first. Don’t let anyone cause you to waste your time or energy on something that’s not worth it. Love will come around again and it will be far better than your last one.