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“Awful, quick, and embarrassing. She was sweet, though, but she’s never getting back those three seconds of her life.”

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No matter what you want, whether it’s money, a title, status, it doesn’t matter. Don’t focus on the END, focus on the PROCESS—the SKILL. SKILL is what will get you to the 1%.

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“I folded all the laundry and took out the trash.”

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The game is not the next World of Warcraft, it’s called Hearthstone, and it is an online card game.

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My boyfriend plays WoW on the weekends, he’s like a level 61 Druid. I’m a level 57 Death Knight. We get together and duel sometimes. He sent me this and it sent chills down my spine. It’s that good!

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This routine of intense playing, without sleeping or eating or going to class lasted for three or four months. My close group of friends soon disappeared—I’d get the occasional text saying, Let’s go to the KPL party tonight! Which, of course, I never responded to.

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I wanna like, club her over the head and drag her back to my apartment so she can be my World of Warcraft-playing, poker-loving, sexy wife.

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I live way out in the suburbs, perhaps not in my mother’s basement, but she is very close by. My favorite shirt is from the Hard Rock Cafe. I’m desperately afraid to try new things, in life, at work, and in bed.

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The first few weeks of school will feel like summer camp. Everyone is just so open and ready to meet their future best friends. Leave your door open and play alternative music so people will know that someone cool lives there. Also develop a strategic plan with your clothes. Wear outfits that will convey to people what kind of stereotype you fall under.