Thought Catalog


Wow, I Boned a Feminist

She made several trips downstairs, so to speak, and told me that she really loved giving blow jays. In fact, as a feminist she made a point of taking as much pleasure as possible in giving blow jays. I was a little confused about the logic of a feminist enjoying giving blow jays, but since I was getting a blow jay at that moment I didn’t think about it very much.

How to Live in New York City

Go home for the holidays and run into old friends from high school. When you tell them that you live in New York, watch their eyes widen. They’ll say, “Oh my god, New York? That’s so crazy. I’m so jealous!” Have a blasé attitude about it but deep down inside, know they have good reason to be jealous.