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Some of these are offensive as heck.

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I walked through the front door and everything was different. “Hi honey,” it sounded like my wife, but it wasn’t my wife. Everything was different, including her.

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My grandma mailed me her hearing aid batteries inside of a Christmas card.

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Now, I’ve been briefed, extensively, on the last 214 years. Both technologically and geopolitically but forgive me any missteps. This has been a bit of a shock to us both.