The Voicemail I Would Send To The Boy Who Hurt Me Kelly Peacock “ I don’t want you to think of me every time you use the polaroid of my naked body as a bookmark.
If My Voicemail Greeting Had An MFA Hassan S. Ali “ Who be I? I am your humble narrator, the voicemail greeting, the conduit between you and my master
45 Things Only Anxious People Understand Victor Onaola “ 42. Hearing any kind of noise in your house whatsoever, you become very certain that you are about to be assassinated.
This Is As Florida As It Gets: 911 Call Transferred To Voicemail After Florida Man Calls For Help Chet Williams “ In the great state of Florida, it appears that if you call 911, you get sent to voicemail.
10 Things We All Say We Do, But Never Actually Do Rachel Hodin “ 3. “I’m going to drink 6 gallons of water every day, just like Jessica Alba! You’ll see!”
If Voicemail Greetings Were Honest Stephanie Georgopulos “ “Here’s an abrasive reggaeton song in lieu of an actual message because I am trapped in 2002. Send help! JK, don’t.”
Why You Shouldn’t Forget To Scrub Your Laptop Before Selling It Stephanie Georgopulos “ Hey Jamie! It was so good to see you – let’s make it more of a thing. Anyway, call me back when you get this message. I was just talking to Mike and our conversation made me realize that I totally spaced on deleting a bunch of files off of the computer. Nothing too crazy… not that you’d ever judge me! It’s just… well, steer clear of opening Photobooth.
I Hate Voicemail Molly McAleer “ Leaving someone a voicemail message on someone’s cell phone in 2011 is not only misguided, it’s selfish. It’s difficult to think of a situation in which leaving a voicemail is necessary because, well, it’s not.
Kelly Peacock 
Hassan S. Ali 
Victor Onaola 
Chet Williams 
Rachel Hodin 
Stephanie Georgopulos 
Molly McAleer