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Yeah, meatpacking corporations are horrendous, greedy, subhuman operations, but who’s really to blame?

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Is all your food organic?

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“One time I was a vegetarian for a week.”

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So you find yourself dating a vegetarian. Or maybe you’re considering doing so. Or maybe you’re just curious of what it’s like dating someone who doesn’t know the joys of bacon. Either way, there are some things that only people who have dated a vegetarian would know.

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You’re not thinking properly. How did man, unlike animals, evolve the cognitive capacity to consider the ethics of eating animals? Part of the answer is …by eating animals.

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Not drinking alcohol: Admirable? Yes. Low key rude and judge-y to gloat about at the office after you’ve only been alcohol-free for less than 100 hours? Hard yes.

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Sooner or later you have to have to have the “I’m a vegetarian” conversation. In my experience, your date will react in one of 6 ways.

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If an animal was killed decades ago for its gorgeous fur, I think wearing that very same coat, stole or vest today is paying honor to its life. The longevity and reuse of vintage fur destroys the need for another animal to die.

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1. Steak.

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“I’m still a vegetarian, you know. The breading is just, like, flour. This doesn’t negate my vegetarianism.”