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I’m here to set the record straight (seeing as NONE of us were born with the flawless hair and easy femininity of Disney Princesses). The Internet quizzes have been lying to you. Here’s what your favorite Disney Princess ACTUALLY says about you.

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Here at Thought Catalog, we like to hold up the films of Disney and consider them with the same level of archetypal appreciation the ancients reserved for their myths.

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The flower that blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all. The Emperor of China, Mulan

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Your Disney film of choice says more than just what VHS was worn to tatters from merciless overuse when you were eight; it says which 1 hour and 30 minutes contained your tiny little dreams. So put on your Tinkerbell costume (you know you still have it), get out your stuffed Boo doll, and settle in for a little trip down One Day My Prince Will Come Lane.

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If a Blogger is the scum that coats the walls of a fish tank, a Troll is the Pleco fish that devours the algae, ravenously and without remorse. The two cohabitate in the blogosphere, yet their motives and means of survival are far from uniform.