“

Like Marilyn Monroe said: “a wise girl leaves her margarita before the leaves fall.”

“

Early 20s: SHOTS SHOT SHOTS SHA SHA SHA SHOT SHOTS SHOTS EVERYBODDDDDDY SH—
Late 20s: ….Shots?

“

Cheers to a new year!

“

I woke up in jail with cuts and bruises all over my face and charges of assaulting two police officers.

“

While everyone reacts differently to alcohol, this is written from various things I observed during my freshman year of college.

“

It’s offensive to reduce my sexual preference to something that’s been beaten into me by some fucked-up twist of fate.

“

I tested the residue of one of the capsules we had leftover. When I got those results, a knot settled into the pit of my stomach. “What have I done?” I asked myself.

“

No one. Zero. Nada.