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To be honest, I still occasionally struggle with this. I remember the first time I referred to my mother and stepdad as “my parents” it felt a little like I was cheating on my father’s memory. Was it okay? Was I allowed to have a place in my heart for another dad?
The vendetta I launched against my new step mother, when I was twelve or so. My best friend at the time helped me concoct downright inhumane schemes against “daddy’s new playmate.” The worst was when we topped off her wine with nail polish remover during a neighborhood Christmas party.