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“The local funeral home was caught selling body parts.”

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Everybody you went to high school with who stayed there is married/engaged/pregnant/all of the above.

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They found blood stains on the floor, pentagrams cut into the hardwood floor, semen on the floor in another room.

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There is a convicted cannibal in our town. Seriously. He killed his friend while drunk, then ate his jaw.

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“When I was a teenager, someone murdered a man, cut his body up, and drove it out to that tiny rural town and dumped the pieces down a hillside.”

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“I was just chilling in the tent using a torch to read my book when all of a sudden the roof just starts bowing inwards. It came down 2/3 feet to the point where I had to lie down so it didn’t touch me. I was still pretty wasted, but I’m sure I saw 10 points pressing in right above my face, like someone was pushing it down with their hands.”

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You should date a small town boy if you want a simple love.

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We get hungry, we get thirsty, we get horny. It’s just another physical response that lets us know that there is a need that is asking to be satisfied.

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When one place is all you’ve ever known, you become comfortable with the familiar. Fear of the unknown creeps into your thoughts and convinces you that you want to stay, succumbing to the predictable pattern of generations before you.

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You may not know everyone, but everyone sure does know you.