I have come to love my body for what it can do rather than what it looks like because in the end, our physical appearance won’t make an ounce of difference in our lives if we don’t have the health to enjoy it.
You’re obsessed with watching the news on new health scares. You’re addicted to anything health related. Your go to tv show is ‘House’, and instead of watching political issues on the news, your eyes are glued to health related breaking news.
I found out I have cancer. Lymphoma, to be exact. I’m 24…what the fuck?
I thought it might be easier if he died. Because then I wouldn’t think of him constantly every time I left. If he were no longer in this physically suffering body, his spirit could stand atop mountains with me, looking back on the trail we conquered together.
Regardless of when that time comes you will look back at this life and agree – life is wonderful, and it is simple.
I didn’t want to tell anyone that I was sick because I didn’t want to be treated differently than anyone else. I didn’t want people to avoid talking about cancer because “the cancer girl” was around.
Choosing a spouse who does not suffer well makes life harder.
The word, cancer, a distant murmur that I had refused to hear; it was like a paper cut—a seemingly simple, yet irreversible mistake of skin splitting, parting like the sea in slow motion.
I wanted to tell you that I’m still hoping for a miracle. Please don’t leave me because I will miss you so much if you go. Please stay because I don’t know if I’m strong enough to handle this alone.
I appreciate, John Green, your portrayal of love caught in a web of sickness. And to tell you the truth, I fell for it – until I lived it.