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It doesn’t matter how long it’s been, whether it’s been three years or three months, you will still love them and miss them. But most of all, you just hope they are happy and healthy.

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We embrace a life of solitude, and we are always okay being alone. 

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I get that we’re family. And I’ve tried to advise you to the best of my ability, but I really think you love to be miserable. 

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No matter how far you’ll ever be, you will always have me.

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I wonder if your guilt eats you alive.

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You are not only my sibling, you are my best friend. You are my confidante, my cushion, my motivator.

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She thought she was home alone, so she and her boyfriend started having sex rather, erm, noisily. Unfortunately, the two weren’t as sneaky as they may have thought, because they weren’t the only ones in the house that night.

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Sitting on the couch watching Lifetime movies while attempting to keep Gatorade down is just a little more tolerable when she’s there to watch you suffer. Bonus: if she lets you use the blanket you’ve fought over forever, you owe her a candy bar.

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No matter how wonderful your own intentions this holiday season, you have zero control over what others will do. You can’t make people accept you.

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Your Barbies won’t make it out alive.