“

Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art.

“

“Hail nothing full of nothing, nothing is with thee.”

“

Understand that once your looks are gone, he will be too.

“

Black sheep are more likely to be hit by lightning than white sheep.

“

Blab all you can about your sex life… Enrich the world with your own unique form of awfulness. For that — and kitten photos — is what the internet was created for. …Go forth, my winged monkey creatures, and blab.