Don’t cry or experience any emotion that could potentially alienate someone. You’re supposed to be a cool cucumber on a first date, the best version of yourself. You are a person who doesn’t fart, poop, cry, get angry, or eat lots of food. You are an even-tempered butterfly, not another crazy single person!
It’s weird that my self-consciousness is experienced anticipatorily and retroactively because I don’t feel self-conscious/ self-shamed/ embarrassed while I engage in such behavior that I later find unseemly. So in effect there’s this weird threshold of perception/ non-perception; before I cross the threshold, I am aware of myself, but once I cross the threshold, I become unaccountable to myself.