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Sometimes it’s too hard for us to admit that someone we are so in love with and someone that we care about that much could have done something so awful to us.

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Understand that your ex’s actions are not a reflection of you. 

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Survivors of abuse, assault or any other heinous crime are often blamed and shamed for being victims in the first place – and it’s no surprise that they struggle with self-blame in the aftermath.

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Disoriented, confused, we build our own narrative to fill in the missing pieces, to create our own ending, to get the closure we need.

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Nine years ago, I put myself in a bad situation. I was assaulted because of x, y, and z – and as long as I don’t do those things, it probably won’t happen again. The attack itself made me feel helpless, but seeing it this way gives me control.